Muthablogga

What a lot I got…no, not jelly tots, … things to do..

Today was one of those days where I accomplished much but felt like I got nothing done at all. How do I explain this? Well it started like any other day, except for the fact that I was completely comatose this morning. I could hear my daughter talking to me, I could here my man preparing  breakfast (he does the  Tuesday and Thursday morning trips to school), but I could not for the love of everything I hold dear, open my eyes or respond with more than a hrrmph. Ever have mornings like that? I think I now understand what its like to be in a coma. Frustrating, to say the least.

By 8h30am though. I was up and ready to take on the world with a vengeance. Unfortunately by this point my wonderful man had returned and decided to take his staff for breakfast. Lucky staff. I would have to wait to complete the endless list of errands I had to run today, and wait for their return, I did. At 10h30am they finally got back and I was off. First stop; Plumbing Etc in Wynberg for my first attempt at finding a new rubber ring for the tumble drier. Turns out they don’t stock them. Second stop, returned the storm trooper helmet my man wore to the masquerade birthday party on Saturday night ( now that is another post on its own). Third stop, Plumstead electrical ( this is where the guy from Plumbing Etc sent me) and they didn’t have stock of the tumble drier thing either. Forth stop, back to plumbing etc ( Fiance called me while I was at Plumstead Electrical to ask if I could pick up another 3 m inflow pipe for the dishwasher. Turns out Plumstead electrical doesn’t stock them.

At this point I realised I hadn’t eaten breakfast and it was a quick stop back home to drop off the new pipe and collect a naartjie for sustenance to see me through the next leg of the journey, and what journey it was. Stopped in at Kenilworth Stodels, surprise, they don’t stock bamboo but I was advised to visit the Constantia nursery. Great( and I say that with the highest amount of sarcasm possible)! Next stop Landsdowne Rd electrical /appliance store. Got the required tumble drier fluff repeller, aka rubber door ring thingy, only to discover  later that it doesn’t fit and they had given me the wrong one ( another errand for another day). Then into, and this was a real nightmare, Cavendish Square. Returned the coffee plunger which cost about R 200 to @Home. It made something more like granule filled slush than coffee ( Eeeewww) and spent some time searching for a new one, with no luck. Also popped into Clicks to pick up a few beauty related goodies and rushed off to Constantia. The time at this point: 13h00. I was starting to panic, where was the day going? Despite having a few more errands on my to do list I decided this would definitely have to be my last stop for the day. I picked up 3 lovely new bamboo trees to be planted in the pots next to the pool. I must have looked like a crazy women though, as they fitted nowhere but through the sun roof of my car. Drove back at an average of 20 to 30kms p/h . Oh dear.

For the next few hours, I worked like my life depended on it. Cleared my email inbox and set off for mom duties. Cuppa tea and a book which put things into perspective and provided the calm I needed for what would follow.

5pm and I received a call from, let’s call him, ‘Disgruntled Dad’. Now, I am not going to go into too much detail, but I have to ask, what is wrong with some of the mutha’s out there that think it is okay to slap their kids? Yesterday my little girl came home and explained that Disgruntled Dad’s daughter had slapped her from behind in the face while in a que for choir ( violence is strictly controlled at school so I was a little shocked and surprised). Considering I have seen my daughter take out other kids in karate competitions, its wasn’t a smart move on the other child’s part, but, I am so proud of my baby for not reacting violently and going straight to her teacher. I called the mutha of said child yesterday.

As you can imagine this didn’t go down well. I was mad as hell at the time. My first question was ‘Do you slap your daughter?’. The answer: silence. I’ll take that as a yes. I know you are divorced but ffs if you are going to slap your child, please explain it is not something you should be doing and please seek some help before your child needs some. Your daughter doesn’t know what to do with your anger. In fact seeing as it has gone this far, she may need help already. Anyway, so Disgruntled Dad called as a follow up on this convo with Nutty Mom from the day before. He apologised on behalf of his daughter and then went off on a tangent saying that, how could I mention that they are divorced? Oh, and their daughter has the most loving environment. He chats to his daughter daily ( he lives in another city and doesn’t really see her). I explained and reiterated that 1. divorce isn’t easy for a child, and 2. no matter how loving the environment, if the child is acting out physically or aggressively they are either learning the behaviour from their role models ( i.e. parents) or they have an emotional issue and are seeking attention to make up for the lack of it ( i.e. requiring  more parental or professional care so they can learn constructive ways of dealing with their feelings). Sorry that’s me, being honest. No, I have never been divorced. However I have been a child that lived through one and guess what? The first step to resolving an issue for your child is admitting there is one. I don’t think Disgruntled Dad has reached this point or understands it. I wasn’t even upset by the drama at this point anymore but Disgruntled Dad certainly didn’t like hearing the truth. The conversation ended with a ‘ I think I am just wasting my time’.Click.

Sorry, just telling it like it is. Pardon me if the truth isn’t what you wanted to hear. You should be concerned for your child’s mind. Blessed not to be in your shoes. Thank you universe for a well rounded and happy child, wonderful man and generally not uncomfortable life. Although even I am human and we go though ups and downs, financially, emotionally and otherwise. At least I have the guts to admit them and thereby get around to fixing them. I am so entirely grateful for having learnt this lesson early in life.

The evening that followed, did actually get better than the rest of the day had been. Had a friend over for dinner, made a gorgeous, yummy winter chicken curry followed by marsh mellows on a stick over the fireplace followed by a dipping of melted chocolate. Scrumptious!

Now that I am reading this, wow, I actually achieved a whole more than I thought I did. Hope your day was even more productive.

Night night fellow mutha’s.

P.s. If you have ever had to deal with parents of children who are bullies or have anger issues please share your advice on dealing with them.